


Waiting for the Sun

by one_man_band



Category: Dead Poets Society (1989)
Genre: Coping, Genderfluid Character, Grieving, M/M, Nonbinary Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-15
Updated: 2018-08-01
Packaged: 2019-05-23 18:17:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 7
Words: 5,229
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14939400
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/one_man_band/pseuds/one_man_band
Summary: Maybe one day everybody was going to be ok again.





	1. Back at the Cave

**Author's Note:**

> The story takes place after the film's ending.
> 
> (English is not my mother tongue)

The boys sat in the cave again. Two months had passed since it all happened. They watched each other in silence aware of what was about to follow but nobody dared saying it out loud.  
Pitts was the one who finally spoke up, “So who will read the opening poem?“ No one answered. No one wanted to take Neil’s place.  
“Maybe it was a bad idea to come here again after all“ Pitts concluded.  
“No it wasn’t!“ Charlie said. He had convinced everybody to take up the meetings again. To him they meant more than just hanging out with his friends. He didn’t want to relinquish that, too, “I think Todd should recite it.“  
“I… I don’t know.“ Todd muttered.  
“Charlie is right. Todd or nobody.“ Knox approved.  
It flattered Todd to be entrusted with this task and he also didn’t want this to fail because of him so he agreed, “Well then give me the book.“  
Pitts handed him the copy of Five Centuries Of Verse. He lifted the board and began to read out the handwritten lines,  
“I went to the woods because I  
wanted to live deliberately…  
I wanted to live deep and suck  
out all the marrow of life!  
To put to rout all that was not life…  
And not, when I had come to die, discover  
that I had not lived…“  
a single tear rolled down his cheek as he spoke the last verses and with trembling hands he passed the book on.  
The rest of the meeting went more smoothly even if the atmosphere was not half as funny as it used to be. Maybe one day everybody was going to be ok again.

After they had left the cave Charlie and Meeks took a walk through the forest before returning to their dorms. The spent a lot of time together lately. The stroll reminded Charlie of the day after the play.  
That day he had wandered aimlessly through the wood until he stopped at a big tree and rested his forehead on the bark. He stayed in this position in silence for a few seconds before starting to yell in despair. The horrific sound echoed through the trees. He sat down on the frozen earth, leaned up against the tree and started sobbing. Suddenly he heard someone calling his name and rushed steps towards him.  
“Charlie, there you are! You left over an hour ago. I was… I mean... we were worried.“ Steven said.  
Charlie did not respond, he did not even face him.  
“You should get of the ground or you will catch a cold.“ Meeks tried again.  
Again no reaction. So he sat down beside Charlie.  
“Just leave me alone, will ya?“ he pressed out.  
“No. Lock yourself up in your room like Todd for all I care, but I’m not going to leave you out here in the cold!“ Steven insisted.  
“In my room.“ Charlie laughed sarcastically, “and then I have a nice chat with Cameron and maybe then he won’t tell the administration that I punched him square in the face and then, and then…“ his voice cracked. “And then I’m liberally allowed to stay in this magnificent school. Now tell me what for?“  
Meeks did not say anything.  
“Neil left me alone. He left me behind in this godforsaken place. Left us.“ Charlie said barely audible now facing the ground again.  
Steven was a bit shocked about that, “But it didn’t have anything to do with you or with the the other Poets.“  
“That’s exactly the problem. He didn’t think about me or about Todd. About the club or Keating. Now we have to stand all of this“ he motioned in the direction he came from “without him. How could he do this to us?“  
There was something about Meeks that could make him feel better instantly. Maybe not then but that he had opened up to him surprised even himself. He had a way of dealing with the situation because he was so extremely smart. They had many long conversations about it since his meltdown. It helped Charlie to forgive Neil. Of course he knew that Neil had other reasons but he still could not understand his decision from the start.  
Charlie was indeed expelled that day but the expulsion was turned into a supspension after his parents donated a considerable sum to Welton.


	2. Coming Out

“Do you consider me manly?“ Charlie suddenly asked his friend out of an impuls.  
Steven had no idea what he wanted to hear from him. “Umm… yes.“ he attempted.  
But Charlie frowned in a way that Meeks could not construe. “You are a very strong boy.“ he tried again thinking of Charlie’s thoroughly fit upper arms from his rowing. As if he could read Steven’s mind he looked down his shoulder at this. “What if I wasn’t a boy?“ Charlie said.  
“What do you mean?“  
“What if I had been born a girl or if… I don’t know… Never mind.“ he had been thinking about this a lot lately.  
Meeks did not know what Charlie was aiming at, but before he could think about it further he answered, “Well, it was a shame because then you wouldn’t be here with me now .“ He immediately blushed and regretted what he just said.  
Charlie smiled broadly at him. “I see it has perks.“ he joked. “But don’t you hate it? Being what they expect you to be. Based on what you have between your legs. As if that had anything to do with your character or interests whatsoever.“  
Now it dawned on Steven, “You mean Hellton is so stereotypal.“  
“Hellton. Society. What if I’m not like that? What if I enjoy romcoms or if I’d like to wear a skirt every once in a while or put on make-up.“ Charlie spoke faster and faster.  
Still a bit taken by surprise Meeks said, “That doesn’t have to change anything I guess. It doesn’t make you any less of a boy or less manly for that matter.“  
Charlie abruptly stopped and grabbed the other by the shoulders to face him, “What if I don’t want to be manly or a boy? Steven, I’m a nonbinary!“ Actually he had planned to say this a lot softer but he also knew beforehand that it was probably not going to work.  
Meeks looked at him wide-eyed, “Does anyone else know?“  
“No, I wanted you to know first.“ he scratched his head facing the ground.  
“Neil would be proud of you.“ Steven smiled.  
Charlie looked a him in wonder, “Yeah? How is that?“  
“Embracing your feminine side, being true to yourself, letting your guard down,…“ For a moment the two of them just stood still smiling at each other until Meeks started grinning and added, “...stop acting like a jerk.“ With that said he started running.  
“Just you wait!“ Charlie yelled and began to chase him.  
He had imagined a few different reactions but this one was definitely unexpected. Yet, he was relieved that it appearently did not change anything between them. It made him think of how Meeks had said it would be a shame if they had never met. A funny feeling rushed through his stomach. Then he noticed that Steven had already outpaced him by now, so he slowed down and walked back to the school.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As a genderqueer I love the headcanon that Charlie is nonbinary, so I had to include it although it doesn't contribute much to the plot.


	3. Different Forms of Coping

In front of the building he saw Knox, “What’s up, Knoxious?“  
Knox turned around, “God, don’t ask! Latin stresses the shit out of me!“  
Charlie, however, had other things on his mind, “Can I ask you a question?“ His smile was suspicious.  
“Geez! Go ahead.“ Knox didn’t know what to expect.  
“So when did you know you love Chris?“ Charlie asked.  
Knox remembered very well, “Straight away. The moment I first saw her when she opened the door for me.“  
“And HOW did you know?“ Charlie probed.  
“I don’t know, I had this feeling“ Knox was interrupted by him, “Like your organs are switching places inside your body?“  
Knox laughed, “Are we still talking about me?“  
Charlie smirked and lifted his arms meaningfully. Then he disappeared inside the building. Knox looked blankly after him and shook his head.  
When Charlie got back to his room he thanked god Cameron was not there. They never got along well but since Keating had to leave they were fighting about anything: when to turn off the lights at night, the whereabouts of a missing pen, whether or not to open the window…  
Charlies spotted the book of poems by Georg Trakl on his nightstand. He had borrowed it from Todd who was obsessed with European Expressionism since _it_ happended. If he was not willing talk about it then maybe this way Charlie could understand how he felt. Though it made him worry about him even more. These poems were so dark and twisted, even Pitts would have cringed. Charlie picked up the book and flicked through the pages when he found a page that was marked by Todd. The poems title was “Decay“. It read:  
A wind is blowing! The green lights  
Sing extinguished - large and satiated  
The moon fulfils the high hall,  
Where no more celebrations sound through.  
The ancestral portraits quietly smile  
And far-off - their last shadow fell,  
The room is sultry with putrefaction,  
Arround which ravens mutely move in circles.  
A lost sense of past times  
Looks from the stony masks,  
Pain distorted and empty of existence  
Mourning in abandonments.  
Sick smells of sunken gardens  
Quietly caress the decay -  
Like the echo of sobbing words  
Quivering over open crypts.

Charlie had to think of Neil just like Todd probably did when he placed the bookmark there. He felt his chest tighten and wanted to hug Todd. Actually he thought he could pay him a visit and check up on him. So he crossed the hallway and knocked on the door.


	4. Making Plans

No one answered so he just softly opened it and came in. Todd did not really talk about it but Charlie knew he struggled a lot with Neil’s death. Probably the most of them all. There had been something about the way they treated each other that was… intense. When Charlie entered Todd’s room he sat on the window board like Neil used to. He stared absently out of the window and did not notice that someone just came in. _No wonder that he can’t deal, living here is fucking cruel!_ , Charlie thought looking at the drawer on the right where no books were in anymore, at the blank desk where no one sat to do homework anymore, at the empty bed where no one snuggled up after snoozing the alarm anymore. This side of the room was dark no matter how much sun light was pouring in, this side of the room was so cold you could see your breath no matter how high the temperature was. It was like looking at a livesized monochrome photograph from the past. Charlie could picture how it kept Todd awake at night, how he sat up straight and watched the other bed for hours. The image was haunting.  
“Hey Todd, how are you doing?“ he asked.  
“Oh hi, I’m fine. I’m already finished with chemistry.“ Todd answered.  
“That’s not what I meant.“ Charlie frowned as he walked up to him, but then stopped at his desk, “Wow Todd, this must be dozens of poems. Are they all written by you?“  
Todd looked across the room at his desk, “Yeah, those are only seventeen.“  
“That’s awesome! But really how are you? You can tell me. Please, tell me. You should talk about it.“ Charlie walked over to Todd’s bed and sat down opposite of him.  
Todd looked at his feet and softly said rather to them than to Charlie, “It gets better, I guess. If numbness is better.“ He paused, then added, “Right after he… you know, I felt this massive weight falling onto me. I just couldn’t accept a world without him, without the chance for us to… There were so many things I hadn’t told him. I wish I told him. And now this emptiness has replaced the grief.“ Now he lifted his head and faced Charlie, “I’m just doing what I have to do like a machine but I don’t enjoy anything anymore. Except for when I write poems. Then I can tell him all the things I should have told him before.“  
Having said all of this out loud Todd felt weird. Charlie had listened intently. He was very glad that Todd had opened up and hoped it helped him but he had another idea how to make things possibly easier for Todd. “What if you could tell him? What if we visited his grave? You could read your poems to him or just lay them onto it and let the rain wash the words into the ground to him. However you like. We make it a club meeting. With him.“ he suggested.  
“But how? We don’t know where his grave is let alone the cemetery is burried in. His parents didn’t even want us to know when the funeral was.“ Todd opposed.  
Charlie was determined though, “I don’t care. I will not respect their wishes. They didn’t respect Neil’s either. We will find out what we need to know. We have a right to mourn.“ _Maybe more than them!_ , Charlie thought.  
“How are we going to proceed?“ Todd asked wanting it to work as much as Charlie did.  
“We will go to the Perry’s. That’s not a problem, I’ve been there.“ he said.  
“And then?“ Todd asked.  
“And then… And then we’ll see.“  
Todd sort of knew what this was supposed to mean but he did not care either and was up to it, “Fine.“  
“Fine?“ Charlie was surprised.  
“Fine.“ Todd smiled.  
“Ok then I’ll pick you up on tomorrow afternoon.“ Charlie held out his hand.  
“See you tomorrow.“ Todd accepted.


	5. Against All Odds

Charlie and Todd had agreed to not tell the others about their plan but they needed a third person. So after having left Todd’s dorm he went straight to Meeks. If he could trust anybody with what they were about to do then it was Steven.  
When he saw Charlie standing in his doorway Meeks‘ eyes lit up. “Hello!“ he cheered, “How have you been?“ he asked and hugged Charlie.  
In order of his gushing welcome Charlie felt his organs change places again.  
He hated to rain on his parade as he let go of him to look into his shiny amber eyes, “Hi! Quite good, but you know, Todd, he has still a hard time because of… everything. I mean they were roommates after all. That’s why I’m here.“ He did not know if anything he had just said made sense.  
However, somehow Steven understood, “We will help Todd cope?“  
“Exactly. All of us actually. And I need especially you. But it’s not entirely… legal.“ Charlie waited for him to say something.  
“Ok, so what’s your plan?“ he went. Charlie was a bit surprised that he did not try to gavel him straight away.  
“I thought we could maybe put the whole thing behind us more easily if we went to Neil’s grave and have our own ceremony, but therefore we may or may not need to enter his parents‘ house while they are away.“ he concluded.  
“In other words: you want to burgle?“ Meeks asked neutrally.  
Charlie studied him to get a hint whether he agrees or not but his poker face did not give anything away. “Yes, and I need you to keep a lookout while Todd and I are inside.“ he said.  
Steven nodded slowly to himself, “Alright. When?“  
Charlie could not believe it, “Really?! You would do that for me?“  
Whithout thinking about it he wrapped his arms around Meeks and planted a kiss on his lips. He smirked broadly, “You are the greatest! We’ll pick you up tomorrow around this time! See you!“ and with that he was gone whithout the chance for Steven to respond something. Partly to appear confident and partly because he feared he would give him the push.

Feeling moony and frightened at the same time Charlie returned to his room.  
Cameron who sat his desktop now must have read the look on his face because he said, “Ohhh what baffles Charles Dalton like this? Or should I say who? Is it a girl?“  
“Just shut the fuck up, Cameron!“ Charlie could not deal with his sarcasm right now.  
“Why so annoyed, Dalton? Come on bring her here and introduce us. I’d love to meet her.“ Cameron did not stop, so Charlie just tried to ignore him and did not answer.  
“I hope you get busted once they see you with her on campus so you get thrown out of here. This time for real.“ he continued.  
Now Charlie lost it, “At least then I wouldn’t have to see your shitface anymore!“  
“C’mon be my guest! How about you aim for my jaw this time to keep it interesting?“ Cameron kept on provoking.  
Charlie clenched his fists, “It’d be my pleasure!“ But then he remembered his and Todd’s plan. He decided that now really was not the time to get in trouble so he walked towards the door again.  
He was almost out of the door when Cameron said, “Y‘all were on another club meeting the other day, weren’t you?“  
Charlie froze, not turning around he said, “Study group. The trig test tommorow, you know.“ He didn’t care that Cameron wouldn’t believe him but he would definitely not tell him anything.  
Cameron said ironically, “You don’t say, Nuwanda.“  
Charlie winced. No one had called him like that after he returned from his suspension. He closed the door and stopped dead in the hallway. How could this person ever be part of the club? How had he attended Keating’s classes and just did not get anything?


	6. The Big Day

The next day Charlie could barely survive his classes because he was only thinking about what Todd, Meeks and him were about to do. In English the class should rate a poem of George Elliot but he could not concentrate on that. He was too busy trying not think about all the things that could go wrong.  
“So do you deduce the importance of the poem by looking out of the window, Mr Dalton???“ Charlie had not noticed that Nolan walked up to him, “Of course, Sir.“  
“And would you be so kind to let all of us in on this trick?“ the teacher urged.  
“ I see a male-dominated world. A poem by a female poet, especially from the Victorian Age is highly relevant.“  
“You see a male-dominated world when you look out of this window?“ Nolan pointed at the window in disbelief. You could only see Weltons‘ campus from this class room.  
“It’s an elitist boys‘ school, Sir.“ he smirked.  
The principal went red with anger still having Charlie’s ‘call from god‘ painfully in mind, “Watch your tongue, Dalton!“  
Knox and Pitts grinned at him as Nolan walked back to the blackboard. He spaced out again.  
In trigonometry class, their last class of the day, Charlie could not really focus on the test. His doubts were becoming bigger and he worried if the risk was to high and he might get Todd and Meeks in trouble. If Steven was going to come with them at all after the show he had put on yesterday. The bell rang and Dr Nolan garnered the boys‘ test papers while everyone shuffled out. Everyone but Todd and Charlie.  
When even the last student had left Charlie got up and walked over to Todd’s seat, “You ready?“ Todd nodded and they went to pick up Meeks. Charlie inhaled deeply before he knocked on the door.  
Steven opened shortly after. “Hello!“ he said smiling. It took a load off Charlie’s mind. Then the three of them went to the bus station in silence. It was not particularly an awkward silence but a conscious one. When they arrived at the Perry’s there was no car in the driveway which meant that at least Neil’s father must have been gone. They sneaked around the house under the cover of shrubbery to catch a glimpse through the windows. Mrs Perry was indeed still at home. She sat at the dressing table in the bedroom and pinned her hair up.  
As she put ear cuffs in Meeks whispered, “She’s all dressed in black. Maybe she’s on her way to the cemetery.“  
“Then we only had to follow her. It‘s easier than we thought!“ Charlie said maybe a bit too loudly for someone who is hiding in the bushes.  
“You can follow her. I will go inside.“ Todd said and went on even quieter, “Maybe I find something that explains it. A note of sorts.“  
For a moment the others only watched him, then Meeks said, “Then we have to branch out. You go inside, one waits outside to alarm you just in case and one follows her.“  
“No, both of you have to follow her or it’s too obvious. Then it looks more like you two are taking ar walk or something.“ Todd disagreed.  
“But then no one keeps watch. That’s too risky!“ Charlie argued against. That was the moment they heard the front door swing open.  
“Come on, follow her. I’ll be fine, I swear.“ Todd intended apodictically.  
Without another word Steven and Charlie hurried back around the house. They watched Mrs Perry go down the street with a bouquet in her hand. Shortly before she turned into another street they emerged out of the thicket and followed her.  
Charlie took the chance to declare himself, “Because of yesterday… “ he put his hand on his neck not knowing what to do with it otherwise, “I did not mean to overwhelm you… I was just very glad you do all of this for me. I mean for us.“ It was difficult for him to say what he was driving at, “But to be honest I wanted to do this for quite some time now.“ He looked at him expectantly.  
Meeks blushed. “When this is over you may do it again. I liked it.“ he smirked at the ground while adjusting his glasses.  
Now Charlie beamed from one ear to another and took his hand. “Belongs to the disguise.“ he winked.  
Meanwhile Todd looked for a way inside. He looked out for the neighbours and then tried to open the front door. It was locked of course but it was worth a try. He walked around the house again for open windows. There were none on the ground floor but one on the first floor. He tried to find out how to get up there. The best way was probably to climb the down spout he figured. It was harder than he had imagined but finally he could put one knee on the window sill. He pushed the window far open and slid in. It was the bathroom. Todd closed the window to the same degree like it had been and left. He tried a few doors until he found Neil’s bedroom. First he could not move at the sight but then he urged himself to investigate it. Clothes, photographes, personal things but no farewell letter. Nothing that would only hint he could be dead. As if he might return any minute. Anyway if there was a letter and his parents found it they would keep it with their belongings he thought. He looked at everything one more time and went downstairs. It felt wrong to go into the Perry’s bedroom but he did not feel too guilty after all. He opened the drawers of the nightstands but there was not a thing of interest either. Losing hope he sat down on a chair of some desk in the office and opened the drawers. In one of them was a key. Todd put it on the desk to see what was in the big envelope underneath. He pulled out the sheets and flipped through them. They were application forms for a military school. The date stamp said one day before it happened.  
_That’s why he did it!_ , Todd thought in shock. How could Neil's father? He wanted to put the envelope back into the drawer when he noticed a small piece of paper thoroughly folded once. As he picked it up he saw that on the other side was written _For Todd Anderson_. With shaking hands he opened the small note. It read in neat handwriting:  
_Dear Todd,_  
please forgive me.  
You deserve way more than this but I just don’t know how to put into words what you mean to me. So all I can ask for is you to forgive me.  
Tell the Dead Poets I’m sorry.  
Love, Neil  
Todd read it over and over again until the words burnt in his eyes and he broke down crying on the desk.

As soon as Charlie and Meeks had seen on which grave Mrs Perry put down the flowers they hurried back to pick up Todd before she returned. They had just turned into the street when the black car Charlie had seen the last time in front of Henley Hall roared by. “Fuck, that’s Neil‘s dad!“ he threw his hands up in horror.  
“He knows you. You see about Todd and I distract Perry.“ and with that Meeks ran after the car. Mr Perry just got out of the driver’s seat when he showed up in the driveway. “Hello Sir, I’m sorry to bother but I was just jogging by and thought that your engine sounds strange. Maybe something’s wrong with it.“ he said out of breath. Perry, however, had little time for him.  
“I don’t know how someone like you could assess that.“ he eyed him sceptically.  
Steven ignored what he said. “No, for real, Sir, I can assure you in all modesty that I have a profound understanding of car engines. We should have a look under the bonnet.“ he did not even lie about his expert knowledge.  
Mr Perry got really annoyed now and did not trust him but he hoped to end this quickly by giving in, “Fine. Let’s see.“ As they both bended over the car Meeks tried to focus the man’s attention on several constituents of the motor by throwing around technical terms so Charlie could sneak around the house on the other side.  
There Charlie saw Todd through a window. His back was turned to him and he lay with his head on the tabletop. Charlie knocked on the glass. Todd winced. He turned around and Charlie motioned him to come out right away. Todd put the note in his pocket and shoved the letter together with the key back in the drawer.  
“It must be something with the exhaust pipe, I’m sure.“ Steven said convincedly and stooped down next to the car to look underneath it. “Look.“ he pointed at something on the downside.  
“You are crazy, boy.“ Mr Perry pressed through his teeth and followed him down to the ground to looked under his car. Todd opened the front door very slowly and Charlie showed him Mr Perry from behind a bush. He sneaked over to him and they headed out of sight.  
“Maybe I was wrong after all. But better safe than sorry, right? Anyway, it was a pleasure to meet you.“ Meeks held out his hand but Mr Perry refused to take it. “Bye!“ he waved instead and pretended to keep on jogging down the street.  
“Crazy.“ Mr Perry said as he walked into the house. 

Steven stopped when he saw Charlie and Todd sitting on the pavement.  
Todd jumped to his feet, “Thank you so much. You don’t know what it means to me to be given this opportunity.“  
He smiled, “Whenever you need me.“


	7. Sun Rise

Back at school they let Pitts and Knox in on their plans at supper.  
“Wait, you know where… I mean where Neil…? How?“ Knox asked.  
Todd and Charlie exchanged a look. Charlie answered, “Well, we went to the Perry’s and-“  
“You burgled?!“ Pitts interrupted him.  
“Yes and no.“ Charlie grinned and then explained what had happened.  
“YOU burgled?!“ Knox asked Todd in disbelief.  
Todd nodded slightly, “Yes. And now I know now why he… did it.“ Pitts choked on his food with shock. Everyone looked at Todd expectantly. “His parents wanted him go to some military school. I found the application.“  
After a long moment of silence Charlie said, “I don’t know… I feel… relieved. It’s an explanation.“ The boys knew what he meant. They had similiar feelings about the new insight. After all the uncertainty and the recurring unanswered question _'Why?'_ bothered each of them the most.

 

Next morning the club gathered around Neil’s grave. This time Meeks voluntarily opened the meeting with the Thorreau poem. Then everybody recited one of Neil’s favourite poems apart from Todd who chose his best original piece. All of them had brought one thing that reminded them of Neil and put them in front of the tomb stone one by one: a copy of A Midsummer Night’s Dream, the God of the cave, the scribbled on blank page of Five Centuries Of Verse, a pipe, and a pencil of an unbeloved desk set. Todd also burried the poems he didn’t want the others to hear under a stone on the grave and then closed the last meeting with Neil by reading out his farewell note. Even though it was adressed at him he thought the others should know what his last words were. When they left the cemetery it felt like Neil would finally be with them again. Not like in the past weeks when his death haunted them all the time, more like his memory was always somewhere shining in the back of their minds and his liveliness remained on earth and accompnied them by now.  
Just before they were about to arrive at the campus Charlie said, “There is another thing I wanted to tell you.“ The others looked at him in expectation. He hesiated but finally found the strength to say, “I’m nonbinary.“ A moment of silence followed.  
Knox was the first one to regain his composure, “Wow! … That came out of the blue.“  
“Did it really?“ Todd countered which made Pitts giggle.  
Knox grinned, “Yeah you’re right. Nothing ever seemed to be this right.“  
“For real?“ Charlie frowned.  
Gerard replied, “Now that I think about it I’d be worried if you were to obey gender restrictions. Knox and Todd, too, apparently.“  
“What about you, Meeks? You don’t seem surprised either.“ Knox noticed that he had remained silent.  
“Yeah, I already knew.“ Steven admitted.  
Pitts raised an eyebrow at Charlie, “You told him seperately?“  
Charlie blushed, “Yeah… well… whatever.“ He tried to think of something to change the topic, “Anyway it doesn’t change anything if you were wondering. I go by any pronouns, you can use whatever you want to refer to me but I get that you will probably stick with he/him out of habit and that’s fine with me.“  
Back at school Meeks and Charlie let the others go inside without them. Charlie took Steven‘s hand and led him around the building. When they were at a save place he faced him now holding both his hands and said, “ You gave me permission.“  
Meeks smiled and then Charlie kissed him passionately.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So that's it. I hope you liked it, if so feel free to comment :) Criticism is welcome, too.


End file.
